Look, eating with metal utensils is the literal worst thing you can do.

I mean, just look at the science of it. Metal knives and forks are made of stainless steel. Steel is part iron. Iron is the element that everything fuses into or fizzles away to.

All the elements in the universe come from stars. In the beginning, we had some free-floating particles which started banding together to become atoms. Helium, to be specific. Then a bunch of helium collapsed together to form a star.

In the core of the star, things were cramped. So those helium atoms banded together even more, fusing into heavier elements like carbon, oxygen, and other things that could make us, humans. Starts exploded into super novae and sprayed their life-atoms to allow the formation of planets. They made all those living elements.

But they also made a bunch of iron.

Iron is not the heaviest element. There are a tonne (pun intended) heavier elements. But the thing with them is they are not stable. They fizzle out slowly. Technically, it’s called decay. Except they don’t decay into helium. After billions and trillions of years, they will all decay into iron.

So iron is the death state of matter.

We are matter too, even though we have a soul (or multiple souls, if we’re strong enough to hold them) and we are subject to the laws of matter. And what is the most terrible event for any kind of matter?

Death. The moment when a living thing becomes unliving. That is the moment when the universe holds its breath. Each time. Especially if the dying thing is something as precious and special as a human being from the early 2000s back on Earth.

So when you’re eating with a tiny iron hand, it’s like eating with a dead baby’s paw. You’re literally putting those dead atoms inside you. That’s gotta be bad for you, right?

Leave a Reply