So I have been granted the privilege of becoming a Dreamer, or whatever. And I do not mean I have plans and aspirations. I am a Dreamer with a capital D, a privilege granted to me by Hali, the undying necromancer from planet whatever who came to me in a dream.
At first, I thought it was all just a dream. Everything was dreamy and cloudy with gusts of snow and ash swirling around in fantastic spirals that both obscured the senses and titillated the spirit, drawing forth the images of long-forgotten half-intuitions about the world, visages of True Gods and the clockwork of the ever-turning spheres of the spirit world. But then all that blew over and I saw a great cold-swept room. Like a throne room in a European castle, except for some scary statues that were not human. Ancient horrors that dwell behind our eyeballs, fear and flight being the natural reactions to the mere recollection of them.
In this great big hall, I saw the apparition of an old alchemist who introduced himself as Hali. He told me I possessed a rare talent of Dreamscaping or Dreamtravel, or whatever, which meant my mind could explore realities hidden from the eyes of mankind. I called his bullshit but he insisted on proving it was true which he did, over the next five nights and in a very convoluted way. I am not going to bore you with the details, suffice it to say, he was telling the truth, and I was actually travelling through time and space in my sleep. Weird, right?
So anyway, he explained he hailed from a distant planet whose name I forgot, and that he had an important message for me which would alter my destiny. I asked him how come he looked human if he was an alien and how come could aliens be humans and what are the odds of evolution on a distant planet have “accidentally” (I know evolution is not an accident, but it “kind of” is) lead to creating an identical organism. He told me his ancestors were born on Earth and transported to this faraway star system. I asked him to go on.
He told me the universe was full of unfathomable intelligence so alien, that any glimpse into its workings, even if just a look at their architecture, was sure to drive a man mad. I asked him how come we spoke the same language, and he told me he was using telepathy, and I said okay, but then I asked how this communication worked. Energy can travel at the speed of light, if he was in a different star system, it would take his “telepathic messages” AT LEAST a few years to reach me and my response would take another few years to reach him. That is if his planet was orbiting the nearest star, whose name I could not recall at the time. He said we were talking DESPITE time and space, across centuries and endless vastness of an empty, unforgiving cosmos. I said that was very convenient.
He rolleth his eyes at me and transported me to the even vaster hall of Carcosa where the King in Yellow dwelleth in his monstrous throne. A cage was hung up high over the stone floor in which the Demented Pope of The Sea of Steam was imprisoned, treated as an oracle plaything by the king himself. Hali, my wizard companion, explained that the king was plotting to reclaim his dominion over the planet Earth again and that his emissaries would infiltrate the governments to make people worship the king as they did millennia ago. I asked what was the problem with that and I said people had always worshiped gods and there was no way of knowing which were “true gods” and which were not, and who is to say it is worse to worship this King in Yellow dude than it is a magic carpenter or a camel salesman from the Middle East.
Hali seemed baffled at my words and proceeded to warning me that once the king’s reign of minds was established, he could unleash the horrors or Yog-Sothoth and the Abominable Snowmen upon our world. I rolled my eyes loudly and then nodded my head in defeat, knowing Hali would go to great BORING lenghts to prove to me he was telling the truth, so I just agreed to listen to what my part in it was.
He said we could not do anything, for the king’s machinations were much more than any of us or all of us together. So I asked him what the point of it all was. He made me swear I would not reveal any of this to anybody on Earth to preserve their peace and serenity while they can still have any. I sighed at that nonsense and swore, double-swore, cross my heart and hope to die.
Except I did not keep my word, and I am revealing it all to you. Writing this from my boring cubicle at a boring ass job, seemingly indistinguishable from other boring shlobs like me, and yet imbued with the great power of Dreamvision, or whatever. Oh reader, across the vastness of the Internet and the sea of time, be warned. There is a darkness stirring millions of light years away and it wants to use us to its cruel ends. And possibly make us slaves and/or food for awesome space monsters.